I’m not a religious person, but I do enjoy that in the darkest days of the year, people (at least where I live) do seem to be a little bit more conscious of kindness and patience. Okay, sure, maybe not in grocery or department store aisles two days before Christmas. But I’ve witnessed a bit better behavior among drivers lately, so there’s one anecdotal piece of evidence. And in this hectic week, I’m going to suggest you give yourself a gift, no rushing to a store or hopping online required.
I’m going to suggest you give yourself what I am giving myself: the gift of self-compassion.
This is something I’ve been working on giving myself every day for some time. It costs nothing and yet offers a great deal.
By giving myself some compassion, I am acknowledging my childhood traumas might be triggered by whatever is going on that’s chipping away at my patience, self-worth, humility, calmness… my inner peace. It offers a little bit of space to slow down and think before I act or speak. It creates space to think, “What is needed right now?” And, “How can I stand for myself without going to war against anyone else?”
When I give myself that gift, I am refusing to take on whatever negative bullshit someone else is trying to hand me. My psyche is not a department store return window, a pawn shop counter or a donation bin, and I don’t have to accept something just because someone (or some old trauma) wants to unload it.
I’m still learning to do this. Sometimes, I’m better at it than other days. And that’s OK. (See? Self-compassion in action right there). The point is that the more I do it, the easier it gets to tap into it when things really go awry.
So, whatever you’re celebrating, I encourage you to give this gift to yourself. The world will keep throwing things at you. You don’t have to catch them.
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