This is my fourth and last installment in my first series about an article in The Atlantic about luck in athletics. Links to the other three are below. If you’re reading this via email and you want those links, please click the link to read this Warm Current on the website. As I work through improving the tech on this thing it seems my newsletter plugin doesn’t support links. Weird, but I’ll find a workaround eventually.
As for luck in athletics, that Atlantic piece includes a pithy vignette: A youth soccer player who missed a text from his team’s manager saying he’d been dropped from the roster. He showed up for the bus anyway, went along for the ride, subbed in when another player got injured, impressed the manager, and eventually played in the Premier League.
He succeeded because he didn’t get the message that he’d failed.
This captures something I’m trying to show regarding commitment. Real commitment means showing up even when the outcome is uncertain.
I’ve spent a lot of energy trying to control outcomes. Training perfectly so I’ll hit my race goal. Being a good partner so the relationship will work (I’ll say more about this in future posts). Saying the right thing so people will respond the way I want.
But accepting that luck matters means accepting that you can do everything right and still not get the result you wanted. And somehow you keep showing up anyway.
This is what Commit actually looks like when you stop believing you control outcomes.
It’s not grinding harder to force a specific result (and getting angry when it doesn’t). It’s doing your part (training consistently, showing up for people, being honest about what you need) and then letting go of your grip on what happens next.
The soccer player didn’t show up to the bus knowing he’d make the Premier League. He just showed up because that’s what committed players do. The opportunity came because he was present when luck arrived.
I’m trying to apply this to my own life. I write this newsletter not knowing if anyone will subscribe. I show up for runs even when my body’s not cooperating. Some of it will pay off. Some won’t. The commitment is to the showing up, not to a promised outcome.
This is harder than it sounds. Our culture tells us that if we just work hard enough, we’ll succeed. The manosphere especially sells this. Follow the formula, put in the effort, get the results. It’s appealing because it suggests we’re in control.
But we’re not entirely in control.
My kids and anyone I’ve coached knows I say this all the time: There’s only one thing we control: Ourselves. Whether we show up, whether we do the work, whether we treat people well, whether we keep trying after setbacks.
What we don’t control is literally everything else. We don’t control other people’s choices, injuries, economic conditions, whether our talent and effort happens to be what’s needed at a particular moment.
So, yeah. Show up. Do your part. Be ready when opportunity knocks. And give yourself grace when it doesn’t.
That soccer player could have stayed home after being dropped. He showed up anyway. Because you can’t succeed if you’re not there.
If someone you know could use encouragement to chill out on the grind culture, please share this post and encourage them to subscribe to Warm Current.
The first post in this series is “How My Track Team Got So Huge.“
The second post in this series is “The Myth of Control.“
The third post is: “What the Hustle Bros Won’t Tell You.”